Maturity is understanding that change comes only from you. Stop depending on others to make things happen for you.
When you are a child, you are told when to get up, eat and sleep along with a multitude of other tasks such as brushing your teeth, taking a bath, when to go to school, and so forth. As you grow older, you learn to do these things on your own. Some people learn faster than others. Some learn to get up without an alarm clock, others need multiple alarms. Some do their own laundry or dishes regularly, others do them when they absolutely have to (after it piles up). Even others, who may still be living with their parents or grandparents, leave their laundry or dishes for others to do them or wait to do them until they get reminded multiple times to do them. Everyone wants clean dishes and laundry, but not everyone wants to do the work to attain clean dishes and laundry. This is the same as everyone wants success, but not everyone wants to do the work to be successful. If you are not willing to do the work to obtain the things you want (even as simple as doing laundry) and leave it to others to do, that only makes others more skillful at those tasks, which will lead to these others being a lot more independent and responsible than you and eventually to them being more capable of surviving and succeeding in this world. Understand that doing things yourself is integral to your success.
You need to understand that one of the key goals in life to happiness, which will lead to less anxiety/fear and more confidence, is mastering daily life skills. If you can hold down a job, pay your bills timely, cook a meal, wash your own dishes, do your own laundry (even mend a button or two), you are well on your way to living an independent life. If not, you will always be dependent on others for tasks you cannot do, and if so, what happens when they are gone and won’t do them anymore for you? Not only will this add to your worry and anxiety about your life, you likely do not have a good relationship with whom you are living with if you are not doing things for yourself and burdening others. Additionally, if you are always unsure of how to do things, you are not able to make good decisions about issues that affect your life. If this is the case, you are stuck in a circle of poor decision making, increasing anxiety, lack of confidence and poor relationships with people. No one can get you out of this crazy unhappy circle but you.
So grow-up, you are not a child anymore. No one is obligated to take care of you. You are responsible for your own life and only you can make the change. Waiting doesn’t change anything. You need to do the work, you need to learn the daily skills, not someone else. Stop depending on others to do things for you…you are a grown-up! Every single day work towards doing a few more things for yourself and you will see how much better you will feel about yourself. What is amazing is that in addition to you feeling better and more confident, your relationships with others will improve dramatically.
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